As I Look Back Over My Life…

There is no doubt that a retired person has more time than those caught up in the throes of working. We have more time to do a great many things, but many of us spend a great deal of time thinking about our past; wishing we had done things differently, or wondering if we’ll ever have a chance to do something we missed:

O God, You have taught me from my youth,
And I still declare Your wondrous works and miraculous deeds.
18 And even when I am old and gray-headed, O God, do not abandon me,
Until I declare Your [mighty] strength to this generation,
Your power to all who are to come.
19 Your righteousness, O God, reaches to the [height of the] heavens,
You who have done great things;
O God, who is like You, [who is Your equal]? Psalm 71: 17-19 (AMP)

When I look back over my life, I see a pattern of failing to act on things that the Lord laid on my heart. Sometimes it was due to fear, sometimes because I was too wrapped up in foolishness. Whatever the reason, there were some good teaching moments that I failed to release. My prayer today is like that of the Psalmist: “O God do not abandon me, Until I declare Your (mighty) strength to this generation”. There are just some things that I feel as if I need to release to my grandchildren and great grandchildren. I don’t want to avoid the difficult topics because I fear their reaction (or their parents) toward me might be less than positive.

God is mighty and powerful, there is none like Him in all the earth. Yet He is a righteous God and wants a righteous people. He will do great things for us, as we put our hope, our trust, our very lives in His Hands. If there is one message I want to convey to those I love in this seemingly godless generation:

Why am I so overwrought? Why am I so disturbed? Why can’t I just hope in God? Despite all my emotions, I will believe and praise the One who saves me and is my life. Psalm 42:5 (The Voice)

As one of the Winans penned these words:

Troubles will come
Troubles will go
When it’s all said and done
One thing I know

It’s gonna be alright
It’s just the way He planned it
It’s gonna be okay
Just hold on…

Songwriters: Carvin Winans / Jennifer E. Brantley



  1. Laetitia Benberry on April 8, 2021 at 8:28 am

    Amen Maria! A great word as God directs us we need to share wisdom with others especially with our family if they will allow us. . ” “Cry loud, spare not.”

  2. Shawn Smith on April 11, 2021 at 5:31 pm

    I can only wish that my grandmother was here to release wisdom to my children and grandchildren (and myself).